Waiting for a Slab

We got a building permit from the Shire the other day. I thought all approvals had been approved, but it seems that this is the last one. For now. Still, at least we have been told we are in the ‘scheduling’ stage, which means that the trades people are being allocated to actually do the work (at the appropriate juncture, in due course, in the fullness of time). We have been told we will be fast tracked because we’re special. But then everyone’s special.

We have been asked to write a review of Smart Homes, and I couldn’t quite see the point, given that the builder’s job is to build homes and we haven’t had a grain of sand on the block disturbed yet, but they offered a $100 voucher for the review which I have no problem in accepting. I write this blog for free (and for pleasure), so a hundy is gonna be a good bonus for a fraction of the words. I decided to work out what they’re giving away. Brickies lay bricks for around $85 per hour in WA. And with facing bricks costing around a dollar each, they’ve given us 15 bricks, laid for free. Oh – but there’s mortar. OK, around 12 bricks. And coffee breaks, toilet breaks, talking to the apprentice, pranking the apprentice, turning the radio on, picking up social media messages, posting online and doing the footy tips. I hope it equates to a whole brick, at least!

Before the slab will come the Siteworks. Smart Homes defines this as clearing the land, levelling it, installing retaining walls (if needed), surveying, and pegging out where the new house is going. We’ve heard some stories about siteworks blowing out quite a bit, with all sorts of hidden costs – for example a lot of filling needed, or soil treatments that become necessary. I don’t think this will happen to us; the block seems to layman me to have been developed to a high standard by Cedar Woods. After all, the builder has committed to a fixed cost Siteworks of 18K, and they wouldn’t do that if our block was in Chernobyl. In fact, we think that siteworks might be a quick milestone, because the block is already cleared, levelled and surveyed. Retaining walls are already there. We’re just hoping that this stage will just be a bit of a scrape and a smooth. Like a visit to the chiropodist.

When the slab is finally laid to rest on our block of land, and after the appropriate mourning period, we will have a slab party. I was impressed to learn that the developers condone this practice, and even provide a free package of two slabs: Soft drink and bangers. All this in the spirit of promoting strong, tight-knit communities. What a bunch of good eggs! I’m hoping we get our slab down first, then we should be invited to all our neighbours’ slab parties. Mind you, it isn’t often I’m invited back after people have met me.

I’m really hoping to post some real progress soon. With pictures. A brick here, a door there. Something other than planning, choosing or waiting. Something real. I know from my software development days that omitting a solid system design with well-understood models and specifications is a disaster. Simply jumping in and starting to code software (traditionally the construction stages) results in poor quality software with no solid foundations. Pick any software system released by a government agency, either internally or to the general public. Remember the covid contact tracing apps? Or trying to register for your proof of vaccination? Idiots. No, I’m happy to stay in the design stage for a while, rather than leaping in to the build like a baby programmer.